What Not To Say in Child Custody Court?

Custody

Mar 7, 2025 | Content

Child custody hearings can be extremely stressful. If you say the wrong thing or make a poor impression, it could impact your life and your children’s lives for years to come.

If you are wondering about what not to say in child custody court, thorough preparation with your family law attorney can help you. Understanding how judges may interpret your words in making custody decisions can help you formulate your statements.

Don’t Disparage Your Co-Parent

Your children love and depend on your co-parent. Speaking ill of them in court could cause a judge to look less favorably on you as a custodial parent, and that is something to avoid. Family court judges hesitate to award custody to a parent who will try to interfere in the children’s relationship with their other parent.

You do not have to pretend to be best friends with your co-parent if the relationship between you is strained. However, your words should indicate a willingness to find common ground with them for the benefit of your shared children. A judge wants to hear that you and your co-parent can work together to resolve problems and make decisions involving the children.

Don’t Make It About You

At a hearing involving property division or spousal support, it is fine to mention how the judge’s decisions will impact you. At a custody hearing, you should not talk about this—the focus must always remain on the children.

Parents sometimes perceive a custody hearing as an evaluation of their personal worth—it isn’t. Do not try to impress the judge with your professional or homemaking prowess. Equally important, do not try to convince the judge that you are the victim of your co-parent’s behavior.

Instead, focus on your children’s needs and how you meet them. A good parent needs to be able to put their ego aside. Family court judges want to feel confident that you know and understand your children and will be proactive and accountable for their well-being.

Avoid Highlighting Competing Obligations

You are more than just a parent, and family court judges understand that. However, at a custody hearing, it is unwise to emphasize your other obligations.

That does not mean you should lie. If you have a demanding job and your children will spend some of your parenting time under the care of third parties such as grandparents or babysitters, acknowledge it. If your new partner may be around when your children are present, be forthright.

Find a way to admit reality while reassuring the court that your children are your priority. Your family law attorney can help you practice your answers so that you can respond to difficult questions with confidence.

Work With a Family Law Attorney to Avoid Verbal Missteps at a Custody Hearing

Custody hearings are high-stakes environments, and it is natural to feel nervous. If you are concerned with what not to say in child custody court, thorough preparation with your family law attorney can help you give reassuring answers to questions designed to trip you up.

The legal professionals at our firm can ensure you are ready to present your best self in court. Contact us today for assistance preparing for your custody hearing.

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What Not To Say in Child Custody Court?

Don’t Disparage Your Co-Parent

Don’t Make It About You

Avoid Highlighting Competing Obligations

Work With a Family Law Attorney to Avoid Verbal Missteps at a Custody Hearing

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