Divorces involving narcissistic spouses are often high conflict. Even if you hope to have an amicable divorce, a narcissist will refuse to compromise and fight every issue fiercely.
You might receive a more generous property settlement if you can prove your spouse mistreated you, and your spouse’s bad behavior can influence the child custody arrangements. However, you must have evidence to prove your spouse’s narcissistic conduct. The capable divorce attorneys at our firm can advise you on how to document narcissistic behavior for legal proceedings.
Force Them to Make a Record
Typical narcissistic behavior includes gaslighting, shifting responsibility, victim blaming and shaming, and manipulation. When confronted with these behaviors, a narcissist will claim they were joking or misunderstood. Narcissists usually refuse to retract lies and distortions even when they are provably false.
You can limit he said/she said disputes by avoiding conversation with the narcissist as much as possible. Forcing them to communicate with you through voicemail, text, and email allows you to prove what they said and how they said it.
Preserving these records is critical. Send copies to your divorce attorney regularly so they have them in case you accidentally delete something or your spouse gains access to your computer or phone.
Write Down What You Cannot Record
It may not be possible to avoid conversation with your spouse completely, especially if you have children. When you cannot record an interaction, you must write it down as soon afterward as possible. Get a notebook specifically for this purpose and keep it locked in a safe place, or keep a log electronically in a password-protected file and save it to the cloud.
Narcissists tend to disparage their spouses to others, including your children. When you hear of this behavior, document it with as much detail as possible. Include what the narcissist said, who they said it to, when, and if possible, the context. Our attorneys can use this information when preparing a case for trial.
Obtain Financial Records
Narcissists are controlling, and limiting access to money or information about family finances is one of the ways they exercise control. If this has been the case in your marriage, do your best to collect financial records.
Compile what you have and review it with your attorney. They can give you a list of records you should try to get and suggest how you might obtain them.
Georgia Superior Court Rule 24.2 requires parties to a divorce to exchange financial information. Unfortunately, narcissists are notorious for making incomplete or misleading disclosures. When you have adequate financial records, your divorce attorney can challenge a defective disclosure and bring your spouse’s dishonesty to the court’s attention at trial.
Talk to Your Divorce Attorney About Proving Your Spouse’s Narcissistic Conduct
Your spouse’s narcissistic behavior is probably the reason you are getting divorced. Proving your spouse’s bad behavior can benefit you when a judge decides property and child custody matters.
Documenting narcissistic behavior for legal proceedings requires forethought and discipline, but it is worthwhile. Our attorneys can help. Contact us today.
